Snow, snow, go away. Don’t come back EVER again!!

Sighs. I am so sick of this snow. It had been snowing since 4pm yesterday, all through the night and it’s still snowing today and we have at least 6 inches here. Such a bloody nightmare. It really couldn’t have come at a worst time, I’ve got exams this week and college was shut all last week so I missed out on important study classes and opportunity to ask my lecturer questions and clear some things out in my head.

I have been panicking like mad over my Chemistry exam tomorrow. Yesterday I saw my chemistry lecturer in college, after my biology exam and he said he’s holding a study class this morning, regardless of the weather. I turn up at 9am this morning, no sign of him. So then I brave the elements and go to town and thankfully, the library was open so I’ve been studying Chemistry the past 4 hours. Head is spinning. I feel a little bit better about tomorrow – but there’s still some areas I’m unclear about which could comprise my grade.

I’ve been hoping and praying I won’t need to work later. Not only is the weather too dangerous to drive in but I need time to study. Thankfully my prayers were answered and I got a phone call off my manager to say not to do my calls later as they have hired out a 4×4 and a selected few will be going out in it doing the rounds and visiting clients. They asked me if I would mind visiting a few clients locally this evening and I said I didn’t mind, which I don’t, they only live a few streets away. I’m glad I have more time to study.

Biology exam yesterday, I was fairly confident because I’ve been studying a lot these past few days – I’m always at my best when I revise a few days beforehand, some can’t do that as it makes them mega confused etc but it says in my head a lot better. Anyway I go into the exam and I didn’t like it one little bit! They were really picky at small areas of the syllubus, areas you skim over and you move onto the larger topics. Very little on DNA, proteins and cells. Nothing on food tests whatsoever! Disappointed. I tried my best just need to wait now. I saw my biology lecturer in the corridor after the exam and he offered to go though the paper – I’d rather not know!!

I’ve got my Chemistry exam on Thursday (tomorrow), and meant to have a Chemistry lesson on Friday. However I’ve already informed work I’m available if they need me because in Chemistry I’m sure they’ll just go over the paper – and I’d really rather not.

Chasing Cars (No, not Snow Patrol)

Oh before I forget, here’s the link to fireworks photos I took on Bonfire Night: http://www.esteedphotography.com/2009/11/05/bonfire-night/

I’ve been really busy lately with everything. As I type my dad is talking about his girlfriend and it would be nice to spend an hour with him and not hear him talk about her. She is the cause of a lot of our problems although he fails to realise it, and it makes me so angry sometimes I just need to bite my tongue.

Well I start my new job this week. I had the induction last Friday and it was so indepth, so much to remember, just hope I can cope with it! I was given a HUGE folder to look through, as well as some forms to keep and I have sorted them out ready for my first round, visiting the clients in their home. I’m a little nervous, a little excited, also a little upset because I won’t be working at the sheltered housing scheme as much any more, it’s looking uncertain as to whether I can return there actually. I did enjoy the job, but I guess everyone needs to move on sometime. I need to focus on my college and at the same time generate enough income to keep the house running, it’s a heck of a lot on my mind.

Toby is laying beside me right now falling asleep on my lap (squeezing his head between my laptop and my belly), he’s so adorable. Although at the moment he’s got a thing with chasing cars and it is a bit concerning… thankfully he’s been on the lead when he goes to run after them so I can hold him back, but I hope he grows out of it soon because it’s not good! I think he developed it because of his chasing squirrels (just let out a little snort as it reminded me of the recently released movie, ‘Up’ – “SQUIRRELS!!” … er what’s she on? I hear you ask, watch the film you’ll understand)

Anyway I’m going to go to the Red Cross meeting now, think I got the First Aid updates due, plus we’ll be discussing the trauma management course next weekend I think, am looking forward to that. Exhausting weekend but a huge learning experience.

See ya.

Tags: college, jobs, pets, red cross

Bonfire Night

I have chocolate on my laptop. Ain’t that typical. I am half tempted to lick it as I LURVE chocolate but that would be just gross.

So yeah back to college now and to say it’s giving me a headache is an understatement. I’m finding Chemistry incredibly difficult at the moment and spent practically all day yesterday trying to get my head around ‘moles’, molecular masses and how to calculate volume of moles in a solution and basically hardcore chemistry. No faffing about this is the core of what chemistry is all about and it’s so difficult!!

To make matters worse I have a new job (yay me!), but it means I will need to miss two lessons coming up so that I can attend a training course I need to go on, two lessons doesn’t sound like much but it is really. I do study a lot outside of the class though which is in my favour.

Jim came down last night and it’s so good to see him again, it really is. I miss him a lot when he’s away and I just feel much more content when he is here. He bought us a curry earlier which definitely warmed us up in this cold weather and now dad and Jim are watching the footy while I go out every now and then, taking photos of the fireworks as it’s Bonfire Night.

If the photos are any good, I’ll upload them.

Toby was managing well with the fireworks until about 30 minutes ago and now he is shaking like a leaf. Poor little thing. I’m finding it hard to type as he is sitting next to me on the sofa, leaning against my arm, just now he was laying by me trying to get his head under the laptop to hide. He’s getting a lot of cuddles tonight.

Tags: college, life, pets

I’m OK

Siiiiigh… I feel bad. It’s half term and I should be studying but it’s a matter of finding the time. I’m working practially all this week. I was working monday, Tuesday, training course today and tomorrow, then working Friday, Saturday and Sunday – then back in college on monday. Time just whizzes by and while I’m glad to be doing things and I also like being in work, there’s part of my brain nagging saying I shouldn’t, but debts can’t pay by themselves.

Toby is sitting behind me on this chair – when will he realise this chair is for one person? I’m too soft, I know I am. But he’s so gawd damn cute I can’t help myself.

I dunno I’m juggling quite a bit and I’ve got so much going on in my head it makes me feel down but I’m trying to keep my head up, keep smiling, and keep saying “I’m OK”.

Tags: college, feelings, pets

College and Counsellors

Well I have just done a much needed update to the ‘about me’ section. Feel free to check it out! =)

my psychology teacher is also my personal tutor. Last week we have one to one meetings with our personal tutor to talk about how college is going, any problems etc before half term (which starts tomorrow, yay!!). The meetings are 15 minutes long and I went for mine and the guy who’s “appointment” was before mine was still in the room. As I sit down he asks if it’s ok if he could stay and I said yes, even though I didn’t really want to. The personal tutor was fine with it, and didn’t say otherwise so I just went along with it because I didn’t want to be rude. In all actuality I wish it really was ‘one on one’ so I could talk to my tutor properly. I am struggling. I’m finding the work hard and I’m just about keeping on top of it and I wanted to talk to my tutor about one of my lecturers but I couldn’t when this guy was in the room. Whenever I started talking about something, he’d butt in then he’d talk and go off on a tangent and in the end I thought what’s the point? To be honest I was bitterly disappointed by it. I had my counselling session in college on monday and I mentioned it to her, and she said I could still talk to my tutor or just unload onto her, which I did.

I think I’ve missed something out of this blog so you’re probably a bit confused… A few weeks ago I brokedown in college, I have so much going on I ended up telling all to my personal tutor and she refered me to the college counsellor. I told her I already see a counsellor but I didn’t have an appointment for another few weeks, and she said the wait was too long so I’ve been seeing my college counsellor every week (twice, so far) as well as my other counsellor (who I see roughly 4 – 6 weeks). I’m not sure what to do with my other counsellor… we have a ‘review session’ coming up to decide to stay counselling or not. Seeing as I’m seeing the college counsellor every week for a while I’m not sure if I should carry on with the other one? I don’t know.

Tags: college, life

Work and College

Yesterday I went to the library to study and was there for just under 5 hours. I was hoping I would study biology first and then move onto psychology but I just didn’t have the time. My head was fried. Seriously. I kept getting confused over the chemical structure of two molecules and I thought at the end I cracked it. Then as I was walking home I managed to confuse myself again!! A little bit often is the key I think. They say for every hour you have a biology lecture, you should do an hours study in your own time. I’m surprisingly finding Chemistry easier than biology at the moment – it’s the modules. Once I get my head around it I’ll be fine. If I get my head around it!!

I’m starting to worry over these exams in January already, which probably sounds really daft,  but I need good grades. I’m totally putting myself into this course because I want to get to uni and do the course I want to do.

Anyway I’m still trying to find work. I didn’t hear back from a homecare agency I had an interview with, which disheartened me a bit. I have decent qualifications relevant, have been on training courses to do with the job and have had great experience. I’m thinking the hours I put down on the application form worked against my favour. I put down a few hours here, a few hours there (to work around college) but homecare agencies want persistance, so that you can have the same clients the same time, every day. I’ve applied for an auxiliary nursing position at a hospital and I’ve got two more application forms for day centre sorta places. I would happily take anything at the moment!

Tags: college, jobs/careers, thoughts